Category Archives: 2024

by

Blinders and Binders

Used to be all that mattered to me was what you thought
Used to be what you thought was that I was everything you wanted, tho you knew I was exactly what you needed
Now I know you’re nothing of what I expected nor am I anything you can handle
You thought you could make me change my ways
I shone a light on thoughts and intentions of those who surrounded you till y’all parted ways
Funny how many I saw thru while you refused to make even so much as an attempt for me the same
In vain, so plain, you’d explain
How Everyday you suffered in pain
Silently I caressed every inch,
Trying my best to chase it all away
For some time, I know, you almost forgot that agony
How do I know? You used to wake up just happy
So happy and you used to just hold me
I felt so tiny and safe, like you wouldn’t believe
There was no place I wanted to be more
Then wrapped in my shield that forgot he was so sore, holding me “the way a man should”
Head on your chest, our legs intertwined
Looking back it’s so sad, all that was left behind
You made a point of celebrating me in so many ways
Even before that special day
One year later and you got up and walked away, okay if I’m being honest maybe it was me who stayed.
Whatever the case that was the first time I thought we might not be okay
You once went out of your way to make sure I was a part of everyday
Now you only seek to pull us apart in every way
You want to place blame?
Well hunny that’s a shame
Why don’t you go back to the beginning and try this again
You wonder where you lost me, it was when you stopped lookin
Lookin for or at me, when you started looking past and thru me
When you stopped listening for me it made it so impossible to hear me
Implausible, they say you fear me
Won’t let yourself get near me
Refusing to hear a sound, muzzled now
Like I’m 6′ under ground
You couldn’t hear me, even when I screamed
Blinders and binders they latch onto you
The earthly trail grounds you now
No air time, left me,
Hanging
Out to dry or just for dead?
Either way I ain’t waiting round to be found
I may have been lost this whole time, sadly tho I don’t believe you were ever even really there

by

Darkmess

One tiny little slip .
Oh just an itty bitty fall.
That was the beginning and the end of it all.
All wrapped up.
No bandages, no ties.
No need to cut us free.
Here it is just you and me.
Nothing to hold on to.
Nothing to let go.
We came together so fluidly.
You poured yourself right into me.
While I poured myself all over you.
Spilling past those lips and hips and on to the floor.
Spilling far more than you bargained for.
Definitely more than you’d like to clean up.
I make a mess of everyone I know.
Just like a butterfly I put on a show.
Fluttering from one sputtering heart to the next. Shuddering my windows cuz I know darkness best.
All the colours merely masquerading.
See I colour where most are shading.
In shadows flashy, splashy, squirting colors all around.
Acrylic pours from different floors.
In comes the wind slamming all the doors.
Fanatically on all fours examining my work.
Colour dripping from my hair but I don’t care.
So long as you’re enjoying the view.
Finally taking a step back to look at you.
Instantaneously I can see you’re thru.
All the colour it seems, has drained from you.
Tried telling me to stop, deafly I tried explaining to you.
Blindly you tell me my masterful work is nothing more than a mess you don’t care to see.
That’s when I realize you were not meant for me.
My mess once again enveloped a man.
He had no where left to stand.
How then could he lend a hand.
Worse, how now do I still not understand?