Real is Worth a Try

Few understand I lead by my hand, always feeling my way thru

Completely in the dark, my observations are made

Odd persuasions attempted eventually fade

Instead we trade new perspectives for a new point of view

Refusing to be reflective faking crimes we’d rather let others commit

No memories now, how quickly we forget

Try gaining from loss?

Where is the towel we should toss?

Ring around the rosy, rings around her eyes

It took a ring upon her finger to realize the truth that all that’s real lies

Now filled with tears are her real eyes

©2013 Shavon Taylor

Fork This Road

I just can’t believe how things tend to work out for me

When I’m in the darkest place

When it feels like there is no light for me to see

Out of no where a window appears

It’s open widely to let the brightness shine thru

When I the road seems too rough for me to carry on,

And I don’t know what I’m going to do

Suddenly as I turn a corner that road is split in two

I see a somewhat smoother trail,

Although it doesn’t always look easy,

It’s one that…well it somehow just suits me

I will take this path

For me it will make a world of difference

Giving me the chance to change,

Allowing me to see how my life can make sense

I’ll stop living it in past tense

Moving up, moving on, moving forward

I can make all the bitterness,

All the pain simply fade away

If I only chose to live my life the right way

©2013 Shavon Taylor CloversAllover.com

Happiness

I lay awake at  night wondering how it all went so wrong

How could I let life slip away from me yet again?

How do I fix anything if I’m not sure how it’s broken?

How do I fix my heart if it’s no longer mine to repair?

How will I find happiness when all I see around me is sorrow?

Pain tends to be my closest friend, love the enemy I constantly battle

When I’m alone I try not to think, my heart plays tricks on my mind

I feel everything is best while it all falls upon the floor

How do I pick up the pieces of this shattered time

These hands, my hands are frozen, motionless just below the surface

I’m left grasping at thin air, one day I know I will find something solid

Until that day I’ll wear my mask of happiness for all to see, meanwhile hidden behind is a broken form of me

Happiness is the easiest emotion for others to see me portray, so readily believed

No one questions what seems so normal on the outside

If only you could see through the layers of this facade, or the energy it takes to maintain this image 

This game feels never-ending, certain to drag on 

Soon I will find a way love myself for myself

On that day I will find my own true happiness

©2010 CloversAllOver Shavon Taylor

All Anger Aside

Insanely infuriating at times when it seems I’ve completely lost my mind

Funny part is, it’s never my sanity I’m seeking, nope not what I’m trying to find

Just some insignificant object for some random project I’m doin’ just to kill time, fill the void

When that anxiety comes round I’m one you might actually want to avoid

It’s got nothin’ to do with you but I gotta let it out, or should I say take it out?

Either way I’m sure you’ll know what I’m talkin’ ’bout

So please just ignore it, or move along as I start to scream n shout, don’t take it personally

Whatever you do I only ask that you don’t point out the obvious or throw in your own sarcastic bitterness

That’s usually when my lil outbursts become a huge mess

I can’t…well won’t admit I’m wrong, not in the heat of the moment at least, that’s for damn sure

Silence I swear is the cure, hearing my own stupidity flung back at me

That unanswered accusation that usually makes no sense at all

Feelin’ a lil foolish and probably extremely embarrassed, I calm right down, and apologize real fast

See the truth is I am the best way to defeat me

Sayin that out loud even to me sounds so silly

Just know though truth is all I speak

I realized long ago it’s so not worth the work to keep up the lies

What’s the use in trying to hide?

Doesn’t it feel better to let everyone see what’s inside?

Wouldn’t life be that much easier if we all said exactly how we felt?

Better still exactly what we meant?

Things could be so incredibly different

Though it would help if more of us actually listened too

Maybe even did a lil more with our follow through

Hell, if that were the case I wouldn’t have to explain any of this to all of you

© 2013 Shavon Taylor

Give In or Given?

The flames lick at my conscience

Wondering would it really make that much difference?

Could it actually cause me that much harm?

Why is it evilness comes equipped with such charm?

As do the ones who do more damage than you could’ve imagined

Making it feel so incredibly right committing any sin

Knowing it’s wrong, still loosing control because it just feels so damn right

Evil never really lurks in the darkness,

Their faces aren’t hidden under hoods

No they are out in the open trying to tempt you with insanity disguised as delight

Drawing you nearer as the day moves closer to the shade of night

Twisting your insides, pulling you from any place you try to hide

Once you’ve experienced the taste

You can’t stop yourself from wanting more

The yearning is deep, so deep you can feel the pull right down to your core

Licking your lips as you think maybe just the tip

The tip of the iceberg, the height of the climb

I think I’m going to give in just this one time

©2013 Shavon Taylor

I Would, If I Could But You Can’t So We Won’t

If I could change the world, I would not change the color of the sky

Though I would break even the possibility of a lie

I wouldn’t change a single thing about a rainy day

Instead I’d make it so no one would ever again be lead astray

I would never change the meaning of a child’s laughter

If I could, I would fix the ways we think or ehat people were after

I’d still enjoy the sound of the bird’s song in the morning

I only wish I could prevent death or at least let there be more warning

I’d never want to stop a tear drop shed in joy

Though I’d happily erase all the greed, never another soul would it destroy

Even if I could I wouldn’t change the way I look at love

I wish though, I could replace the things we find so hard to let go of

I wouldn’t change my heart or even how much I care

If I could I’d transform the need for love to be equal with the need for air

I’d leave the beauty of every single sunrise and each and every sunset

Instead I would make us all forget the emotion of regret

I wouldn’t take any of the meaning in family or friends

If I could I would reinvent the way any tragedy ends

I’d erase the hate, replace the fakes, and make love the only thing worth a fight

I’d make it so no one could do wrong, and happiness would never again be gone

We could all still be different, I mean we don’t all have to like the same songs

I just want to make it so we don’t have to hurt to grow,

So we wouldn’t all have to learn damage control

No one would never have to wonder what’s right, because we would all just know

Then never again would there be an emotion we’d be too afraid to show

© 2013 Shavon Taylor

Comfortably Uncontrolled

A flurry of disaster, oh this blizzard I will master

I walk through this storm, albeit blindly

I have yet to see how these clouds bind me

I’ve merely seen a glimpse of the sunny field flowers

The thunder and lightning fuel my powers

Constantly crashing in upon the calm

Crushing dreams inside my own palm

Not willing to change one’s own ways

Inside I’ll stay for days and days

Trying to read others by what I’ve known

Thinkin’ all life’s lessons I’ve outgrown

I’ve learned all I must; I’m sure

By no means will I allow you to believe me pure

Innocent lil wind storms swirl into tornadoes

Unexpected showers become invincible undertows

My thoughts move mountains

My heart bathes in youth’s fountains

Although I know you will always remember me

Inside I am forgotten, no idea who I may be

Letting fate only take it’s course

Leave me alone in my remorse

Knowing all delusions made were my own

Complete insanity has become my home

How do you leave such a tiresome exciting place?

How do you say no to such an enticing face?

This hollow shell you think you know so well

This self-esteem comes straight from Hell

Letting go and living on

You will see me again,

In the crash of light we all call dawn

©2013 Shavon Taylor

Finally Free

As I contemplate all this change, I look around at all the good I’ve found.
Less than 6 months ago I had nothing, so in need.
The greed had taken over me, I’d lost myself.
Gone were my ideals, along with my moral ground.
Once you make up your mind you realize it takes so much less effort to live in the light.
Isn’t it funny how fast things can turn around?
It’s amazing how it all just feels so right!
Don’t be confused, I still battle my demons daily.
Yes it’s a bumpy ride but at least I’m back at the wheel.
I choose where my path shall lead.
I’m going the right direction this time, I can feel it.
Looking ahead now, that’s what I choose to do.
I will no longer look back with that aching dread.
For me; yesterday is gone, over, it’s dead.
My past is now where it belongs, where I have left it.
So it may never again define me, because today I am finally free.

© 2013 CloversAllOver Shavon Taylor

Who am I?

Few admit they know me, more so are those who knew me.
The ones who overcame, got bored of, or just outgrew me are the ones most often to speak freely.
No problem pointing fingers, yes they’re quick to name me.
I only wish that I could kill me, so as to never harm another like you.
To break my chains and forever remain the one you never knew.

I am leaving out the last line for the moment to give you a chance to try to guess. Would love to hear your thoughts or opinions…although I don’t think you can truly get the full effect of the poem with out the last line. That being said, happy guessing 🙂

© 2013 Shavon Taylor